There’s some healing in that. 

The most noble love is that of a child. There innocence is not yet corrupted, the love of a child is transformative.

Last week, my insignificant other expressed his desire to see me, mother. I took offense to that, bitch, I’m titi chacha. Close enough.

Let me refocus.

 I had a brief encounter, with a third grader I soberly danced, I laughed, I learned that state testing is not just outdated; it’s oppressive. It reinforces a system rooted in inequality, therefore it is simply racist. No further explanation needed. Although she didn’t  know ,this is facts, there is an academic achievement gap. Your environment and socioeconomics do dictate the education you get. Most times our children are in the losing end.

When resources are scarce at home and in the classroom, it directly affects our children’s ability to thrive.

That’s why the idea of dismantling the Department of Education is questionable.

If we were stronger as a unit, I honestly wouldn’t give a fuck. But the truth is, I recognize that some if not most of these kids rely on our public school system to meet their most basic needs.

In the 2022–2023 school year, over 146,000 students in NYC public schools experienced homelessness. That’s about 1 in 9 students. The impact? Undeniable. It showed up in their grades. It showed up in their attendance.It showed up in their emotional health.

The Department of Education isn’t going to vanish overnight. It’s made up of federal, state, and local funding. However, removing or reducing federal funding would significantly impact essential programs especially those that serve low-income communities, students with disabilities, and English language learners. It would widen the gap in educational equity and limit access to the basic resources many students depend on. Therefore I stand with the third grader protesting state testing.

Will NYC take a big hit? According to thecity.nyc we are fucked.

Atleast that’s all the information I’ve gathered.

After sitting in a impromptu session, I came home to my boys and found myself inspired by the events that took place. 

A shooting interrupted the community from giving to the community which led to a community coming together to talk about leadership in the community.

That was a lot of community in one day.

But sometimes that’s all it takes.. to have me up at 3am.

Somehow, I found myself entangled in eight different perspectives. I came ready to play air hockey,for months that’s all I’ve wanted.

“As a leader, your presence is going to make others uncomfortable.”
Well damn.

I often express my desire to stay in my lane.
Lately, though, I’ve been noticing I’m ruffling quite a few feathers even with my blinders on.

I struggle with power: its presence, its weight, and its responsibility.
But only when it comes to me.

Over the last 4 months, friendships have shifted, relationships have ended.
A part of me didn’t want to acknowledge it but per usual, the universe left me no choice.

I’ve learned that endings don’t always ask for permission. They just arrive loud, quiet, or somewhere in between. I had been a silent mess, an unhealthy volcano.

I rather be angry than disappointed.
And somehow, in the mess of it all, I’m still here. Still loving. Still me

Even at my most vulnerable moments, I still believed in love.

I’d say this is the most heartbroken I’ve ever been. (That’s for another post)
However, to my core, I remain the same.

I was married to three words throughout the conversation:
Vulnerability, Love, and Leadership.

Vulnerability comes in waves for me.
People are often so focused on their own emotions that I seldom have time to speak. Which isn’t always a bad thing.

Other times, my silence is my vulnerability.
Thank you for allowing me to be quiet.
It means I’m safe. 

“Love” was one of the three things needed to be well balanced, I had plenty.

I’ve come to acknowledge that love is for me and doesn’t have to look the same for you. However my love is easy to manipulate because it is vulnerable. 

I sat there connecting the dots.

I once expressed my frustration with dishonesty. 

I then became dishonest and quickly learned it wasn’t for me. So I chose change not for how it would be received, but because I needed to live in alignment with my truth.

“Leadership” we can reference my previous blogs in which I talk deeply about my parents. 

I was raised by leaders. The ideology that home doesn’t influence your perspective on life?

Not true.

I am ok with leading my own Not because I’m incapable of leading others, or because I don’t care.
But because I am, at my core, a student of life. I will make mistakes.

To my surprise, I’ve met people who struggle with not being liked.
Me? I understand, not everyone will like me.
And I’m at peace with that.

At some point, I realized that in order to live, I needed to let go of survival.
I show my love through acts of service.
And there is no scenario in which anyone can take that away from me or use it against me.
Because I own it. My goal is not for you to need me, or wonder what you would do without me.

It’s to add value.

I’ll show you that my support is unconditional even when I am no longer in service.

Acknowledging that everyone is on their own journey has helped me let go. Try it.

Don’t disrupts someone’s peace because you’re not at ease.
It’s helped me not take everything personally. Until it is personal.

I decided to cleanse silently.
I read The Let Them Theory…
Chile, I’ve been letting them ever since.

“Terminology is important because it lends energy to the conversation”